Thursday, June 17, 2010
Baby it's you ;
No, it has not been easy for me lately. Re-reading what you wrote years ago. What is up with me. I hate everything that is happening right now. I hate everything now. Trying not to take things that way, but every time, it looks like it to me, and it feels like it. No, you guys won't understand if you try and ask me. Things are way too complicated right now. I need some time to think through everything, at the same time i need my friends who understand me best. Florence, Sien Wei. I really need you. I needa cry my heart out but every time i do that, it hurts more. I didn't want to think of anything right now. All i wanna think right now is happiness, be grateful for what I've got . Sighs. Me crying isnt good right. but it's so painful. Now, another issue came about. Thanks mom for bringing the past back. Why won't you trust me? I said I'm sorry for my phone bill, sorry for using the house phone to call my friend's handphone and talked for half an hour. Mom, what point of me having issues and need a friend, do you not get? And right now i need to talk to someone, so how am I gonna call them? Right now I'm getting worst and need someone to talk to mom, i really need my friends now. : '( Mom, listening to sad songs and typing this isn't helping me. My heart is crying. I'm holding my tears back. M heart hurts from doing htat. Mom, I'm sorry for me spending so much. I know that. But now, after what you brought up, i put my phone a side and think more. Hugging all my stuffed toys, trying to make me better,Imagining that it's all my friends that i need a hug from.
So today was a good day i guess. On the bus was hilarious. Thanks Jess for everything that youve done. making me laugh like a mad cow. haha. (: Science was okay. Chemistry is actually easy. haha. I understand it so fast. hahahahah. (: awesome. that's good. cause it normally takes me a while to figure things out for Bio. oh yesterday, during drama, we were learning how to stage fight. it was fun but got carpet burns. Oh gosh, i can hear my mom telling my dad about the house phone bill. i hate this.and i thought today was a good day. somuch for a good day. dad is so pissed! : '( i can hear him. i hate this. sorry but i have no mood to blog anymore :'(
Ashley signing off
Tata
xoxo
ashleylicious
7:37 PM
