Thursday, December 4, 2008
life is just painful like a knife stabbing you
isn't just weird... all you want is to just ran awayy.. to make sure no one finds youu.. like hide and seek.. i wanna hide, you wanna seek...i have no love from friends and familyy.. what do i have? huh?! tell me... everytime i think i was brought down to this world accidentally.. maybe it';s true.. accidentallyyyy!! you know what... i think i'm not going bu3 anymore... i don't want to go there ANYMORE...!!going there is wasting my time!!! i HATE my stupid fcuking ass life...!! whatever i do.. worng or right.. i'm always wrong.. i'm always scolded...my mum always says that please yourself first, don;t please your friend first... yeah.. so i listened to her.. and then i've hurt my friends.. so i pleased my friends first than myself.. then.. i hurt myself.. really bad.. but i.. now don't care anymore... all i need is to suffer a few more years.. and i can lie in that beautiful coffin...i seriouslyy need someone beside me now.. someone who understand me.. someone that knows the pain i'm suffer.. but i can't find that someone.. not even one.. not even a single one...
Todayy woke up at 6:25.. abit later than tuesdayyy.. then makan breakfast.. then go and play golf.. todayy i can't hit.. i can't drive.. but luckyy my irons helped me.. my dad tought me how to play better short game.. by saying* sweep the floor onlyy* so okayy.. then hehee.. wow.. nicee(: then he was like:" waaaa.. chinese school very good in sweeping floor" hahaaaa.. so my dad told my brother to *sweep the floor* like how he asked me.. then my brother can't hit then my father was like:" aiyaaa... private school don;t know how to sweep floor one.. all give the workers to sweep" hahaaaa.. but todayy at least got PAR.. haiyoo.. actuallyy can get birdie one..but then miss the putt..haiyoo.. *sighs* but never mind la.. todayy played 61.. better then that dayy.. heheee.. but 61 still very bad.. so tommorow maybe go SRI DAMANSARA club to train.. woo-hooo can get free training (: heheeeee(:
I guess I just got lostBein' someone else
I tried to kill the pain
Nothin ever helpedI left myself behind
Somewhere along the way
Hopin to come back around
To find myself someday
Lately I'm so tired of waiting for you
To say that it's ok, but tell me
Please, would you one time
Just let me be myself
So I can shine with my own light
Let me be myself
Ashley signing off
Tata
xoxo
ashleylicious
3:21 PM
